How To Tell When Your Food Is Spoiled
Whether you are a mom who cooks for many, a bachelor who cooks on rare occasions for himself, or a new college student who for the first time has his or her own refrigerator -- you will eventually all open the fridge one day and say to yourself, "Can I eat this or will it kill me?"
Well here are some guidelines to help you get through the crisis, so you will know what to eat and what to toss.
EGGS
When something starts pecking its way out of the shell, the egg is
probably past its prime.
DAIRY
PRODUCTS
Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt. Yogurt is spoiled
when it starts to look like cottage cheese. Cottage cheese is
spoiled when it starts to look like regular cheese. Regular cheese is
nothing but spoiled milk anyway and can't get any more spoiled than it
is already.
Cheddar cheese is spoiled when you think it is blue cheese but you
realize you've never purchased that kind.
MAYONNAISE
If it makes you violently ill after you eat it, the mayonnaise
is spoiled.
FROZEN
FOODS
Frozen foods that have become an integral part of the defrosting
problem in your freezer compartment will probably be spoiled (or
wrecked anyway) by the time you pry them out with a kitchen knife.
EXPIRATION
DATES
This is NOT a marketing ploy to encourage you to throw away perfectly
good food so that you'll spend more on groceries. Perhaps you'd
benefit by having a calendar in your kitchen.
MEAT
If opening the refrigerator door causes stray animals from a
three-block radius to congregate outside your house, the meat is
spoiled.
BREAD
Sesame seeds and Poppy seeds are the only officially acceptable "spots"
that should be seen on the surface of any loaf of bread. Fuzzy and
hairy looking white or green growth areas are a good indication that
your bread has turned into a pharmaceutical laboratory experiment.
FLOUR
Flour is spoiled when it wiggles.
LETTUCE
Bibb lettuce is spoiled when you can't get it off the bottom of the
vegetable crisper without Comet. Romaine lettuce is spoiled when it
turns liquid. (We didn't think you needed guidance with this one)
CANNED
GOODS
Any canned goods that have become the size or shape of a softball
should be disposed of.
Carefully.
CARROTS
A carrot that you can tie a clove hitch in is not fresh.
RAISINS
Raisins should not be harder than your teeth.
POTATOES
If it looks like it is ready for planting, toss it.
CHIP
DIP
If you can take it out of its container and bounce it on the floor, it
has gone bad.
EMPTY
CONTAINERS
Putting empty containers back into the refrigerator is an old trick,
but it only works if you live with someone or have a maid.
UNMARKED
ITEMS
You know it is well beyond prime when you're tempted to discard the
Tupperware along with the food. Generally speaking, Tupperware
containers should not burp when you open them.
GENERAL
RULE OF THUMB
Most food cannot be kept longer than the average life span of a
hamster. Keep a hamster in or nearby your refrigerator to gauge this.